Smackdown
3 Mindsets Keeping You from Living Your Priorities

Everyone has too much to do. And, no one feels sorry for you, because you have too many responsibilities. Nor should they.

It was the end of the work day and I’d had the urge to go since 1. I could see the bathroom door from my office.

I was a work machine. Typing out emails as fast as I could.

You are so close to wiping this inbox clean. It’s Friday. Don’t stop. Just keep going, I coached myself.

I hopped up and down a bit in my chair, pounding out one last correspondence. Excited, I hit the send button only to look up at the clock and discover I had missed my window. It was too late. The nanny was supposed to be off the clock. There was no time to stop.

I ran out the office door, fired up my car engine, and blew past every speed limit.

It’s only 10 minutes away. You’ll make it without peeing your pants, I encouraged myself as I blasted the radio to take my mind off the sting in my lower abdomen.

“Like a vir-ir-ir-ir-gin!” I sang along with Madonna at the top of my lungs.

The guy sitting at the red light looked at me like I had lost my mind. I glanced over with a crazy smile like I had indeed lost my mind.

Keep bouncing. Keep singing.

When I made it home, I grabbed the door handle, knowing my moment had finally come, but the door was locked. I fumbled for my keys as I cursed quietly under my breath. (Gasp! I know, shame on me.)

I finally resorted to knocking frantically.

Pleeeeze, open the door!

But, I couldn’t hold it any longer.

There I stood on my front porch with a puddle around my ankles as our nanny opened the door and smiled.

She hadn’t noticed the puddle, until my two yet-to-be-potty-trained sons peered at me from inside and yelled, “Mommy! You peed your pants!”

Have you ever had a moment you realized, Wow, maybe my priorities are out of order?

Well, this was one of those moments for me.

I had been working so hard that even the most essential things in life were being neglected.

When I think back to this season, it’s needless to say that my tragic “pee pee incident” wasn’t the only symptom that my life was falling apart.

I wasn’t eating healthy. I had stopped exercising. My relationships were all going on the back burner. And, most importantly, I felt disconnected from God.

I was doing a lot of good for God by working for faith-based causes, but I wasn’t experiencing the good of God anymore in my real life.

God was like a distant employer who I expected to occasionally give me a high five when performance was at a high.

Since I admitted this 1 year ago on this blog, I’ve literally had thousands of people write me and say, “Me too.”

Many of their accounts have been so vulnerable that I hesitate to share them with you today.

That’s why instead I wanted to share my story once more with you to let you know that you’re not alone. I feel you.

Here’s the difference a year has made for me.

My priorities are in order. But, I've had to do some hard work and confront some lies. 

I had to stop doing many of good things and remind myself what in life really mattered to me.

I realized through this process that 3 mindsets that were keeping me from aligning my real life with my priorities.

Here they are.

3 Mindsets that are Keeping You from Living Your Priorities

1. The Mindset of Bellyaching

Everyone has too much to do.

No one feels sorry for you, because you have too many responsibilities. Nor should they.

If you have too much to do, then stop whatever it is that is overwhelming you and INVITE JESUS IN to help you.

@@When we live real life with Jesus, there should be joy even in the suffering of overwhelm.@@

Take the time you would have spent complaining to a friend or spouse to talk to God about the struggle.

Ask Him for the wisdom you need to quit doing non-essential things and to fight for what really matters in your life.

2. The Mindset of “I CAN’T”

Ever sat across from an overwhelmed friend who to every suggestion to their problems replies, “I can’t… because...”

Try this.

Every time you tell yourself that you “can’t” do something that matters to you, replace the statement with “I won’t.”

See what you learn about yourself.

Here are some examples from my life.

Example 1: "I CAN'T spend time with my kids today, because I have to get this project finished.”

“I WON'T spend time with my kids today, because I failed to plan out this project well.”

Example 2: “I CAN'T work out today, because I’m too busy with family responsibilities.”

“I WON'T work out today, because I chose to go to bed late and not wake up on time.”

Example 3: “I CAN'T do all this follow up for work today, because the kids are home from school.”

“I WON'T follow up with work today, because I choose to spend quality time with my kids.”

Write down every week what matters most to you and set an intention for what you won’t do and for what you’re going to choose to do. 

Choose your priorities. Don't allow them to be circumstantially dished out to you.  

3. The Mindset of “I’m too weak.”

Alone, without God, we’re weak. But time and again, we fail.

God reminds us that it is through Him that we are made strong.

Timothy reminds us to be strong in the grace that IS IN Christ Jesus.

Paul wrote to the Philippians, affirming to us that we can do all things through Christ, because He will strengthen us.

And, in the Old Testament book Isaiah, the people are reminded that in repentance and rest salvation is found and in quietness and trust is strength.

So, how do we allow God’s strength to overcome our weakness in real life?

This supernatural strength can only be found when God to be the source of your life. He must be invited into every aspect of life.

Not just in the morning in a quiet time, but also throughout the day.

Try inviting God’s perspective into even the smallest things and see what happens.

I’ve noticed that when I do this, even trips to the park with my kids turn into moments when complete strangers begin to open up to me about their lives.

It’s in these times that God’s goodness and grace meets real life for the benefit of others, not just myself.

You’re always going to have more to do.

There will always be a reason in which you believe you can’t take time to pray, read your Bible, prioritize faith, or meditate on Truth.

If you don’t fight for these things, they won’t happen on their own.

Life is filled with too many distractions and we live in a world that reinforces these 3 mindsets we just confronted.

I want to encourage you. Today is your day to start living intentionally and to put your priorities into order.

The Real Life Journal will help. 

I created a special tool just for us to utilize and reframe life by placing the Holy Spirit into the center of it. It will help you confront these mindsets and prioritize your life according to what matters most to you.

It’s called the Real Life Journal and it’s available on Amazon right now for you with FREE two-day shipping.

I want to hear from you.

How are you confronting mindsets that are keeping you living your priorities?

Maybe you have some advice that will help our Good Bad Real Life community. Share below in the comments.